Walking with my 30 lb pack is almost the equivalent of walking with the weight I used to carry. I don’t know how I did it, especially since I wasn’t always heavy.
When I mentioned that, Jeremy told me how proud he was that I’ve kept the weight off. Another time, when we were talking about camp, I mentioned how when I first got home and he hugged me, he asked, “Did you get smaller on me?” I didn’t- I the next day, I discovered I was actually exactly the same as the last time I measured myself. I told him that, and that I was surprised because I ate so much at camp that I was sure I would gain. I said that I would be worrying that he would think I had been eating too much if he had been there. He told me that he wouldn’t worry at all because I do so well with moderation and balancing out the times I do eat more that he completely trusts me with food. (Sadly, I don’t always deserve that trust.)
So what I started out typing as two supportive comments Jeremy made while hiking turned into another post highlighting how obsessed with food & weight I still am and how it seems to come into everything. I just want to live my life.
